The best tactic to negotiate salary might be too awkward for most

The best tactic to negotiate salary might be too awkward for mostThe best tactic to negotiate salary might be too awkward for mostPsychologists often talk about the supposed benefits ofembracing discomfort. The idea is that, by leaning into feelings like anxiety and anger instead of resisting them, youll take away their power to consume you whole.This idea has alwaysheld a lot of appeal for me, but I havent always been sure how to put it into practice.So I had a lightbulb moment towards the end of Melissa Dahls book Cringeworthy, in which she describes a very practical strategy for acknowledging your discomfort and giving it a big ol hug.Dahl writes specifically about embracing the inherent awkwardness during a salary negotiation. She quotes Katie Donovan, founder of the consultancy firm Equal Pay Negotiations, saying that the first step in a negotiation is to be silent, hush up, or SHUT UPDonovan said that if youre offered a starting salary thats lower than what you know is the zent ralwert salary for this position, you can say something like Thank you for the offer. Im a little surprised about the salary, though. Based on my research I would have expected it to be in the X range.Even if the hiring manager raises her eyebrows even if he gasps in horror, dont backpedal, and dont run your mouth out of nervousness.As Dahl writes, the hiring manager might not be able to reach the number youre asking for, but letthemtell you that dont undercut yourself by saying that for them.A top executive says she uses the awkward-silence strategy to win negotiationsAlison Green, the woman behind the popular Ask a Manager advice column, has said something similar. On an episode of theAsk a Manager podcast, Green tells a confused caller to ask, Any chance you can go up to X? and then stop talking.Green said Wait for an answer. It might take them a minute, there might be a unterbrechung there. Thats totally okay. Sometimes people get really nervous when theres a pause there and the y start talking again to fill in the silence, and then they end up undercutting themselves and kind of backtracking. Say the words and then wait.Note that this strategy isnt used exclusively by knock-kneed entry-level employees. Its also used by the likes of Joanna Coles, who is the chief content officer at Hearst Magazines, and has served as editor-in-chief of both Marie Claire and Cosmopolitan magazines.On an episode of Business Insiders podcast, This is Success, Coles shared with Business Insider US editor-in-chief Alyson Shontell her best strategy forwinning a negotiation silence.In any kind of negotiation, silence is often your best friend because you dont want to give too much away, Coles told Shontell. Im always amazed when Im negotiating with people from the other side of the desk, how people will rattle on and not stop talking. People talk a lot when theyre nervous.Dahl quotes Green, the Ask a Manager columnist, in Cringeworthy, too. My advice is that you should embrace it, Green said of awkwardness at work, and find the humor in it.This article first appeared on Business Insider.The best tactic to negotiate salary might be too awkward for mostPsychologists often talk about the supposed benefits ofembracing discomfort. The idea is that, by leaning into feelings like anxiety and anger instead of resisting them, youll take away their power to consume you whole.This idea has alwaysheld a lot of appeal for me, but I havent always been sure how to put it into practice.So I had a lightbulb moment towards the end of Melissa Dahls book Cringeworthy, in which she describes a very practical strategy for acknowledging your discomfort and giving it a big ol hug.Dahl writes specifically about embracing the inherent awkwardness during a salary negotiation. She quotes Katie Donovan, founder of the consultancy firm Equal Pay Negotiations, saying that the first step in a negotiation is to be silent, hush up, or SHUT UPFollow Ladders on FlipboardFollow Ladders magazine s on Flipboard covering Happiness, Productivity, Job Satisfaction, Neuroscience, and moreDonovan said that if youre offered a starting salary thats lower than what you know is the median salary for this position, you can say something like Thank you for the offer. Im a little surprised about the salary, though. Based on my research I would have expected it to be in the X range.Even if the hiring manager raises her eyebrows even if he gasps in horror, dont backpedal, and dont run your mouth out of nervousness.As Dahl writes, the hiring manager might not be able to reach the number youre asking for, but letthemtell you that dont undercut yourself by saying that for them.A top executive says she uses the awkward-silence strategy to win negotiationsAlison Green, the woman behind the popular Ask a Manager advice column, has said something similar. On an episode of theAsk a Manager podcast, Green tells a confused caller to ask, Any chance you can go up to X? and then stop talking.Green sa id Wait for an answer. It might take them a minute, there might be a pause there. Thats totally okay. Sometimes people get really nervous when theres a pause there and they start talking again to fill in the silence, and then they end up undercutting themselves and kind of backtracking. Say the words and then wait.Note that this strategy isnt used exclusively by knock-kneed entry-level employees. Its also used by the likes of Joanna Coles, who is the chief content officer at Hearst Magazines, and has served as editor-in-chief of both Marie Claire and Cosmopolitan magazines.On an episode of Business Insiders podcast, This is Success, Coles shared with Business Insider US editor-in-chief Alyson Shontell her best strategy forwinning a negotiation silence.In any kind of negotiation, silence is often your best friend because you dont want to give too much away, Coles told Shontell. Im always amazed when Im negotiating with people from the other side of the desk, how people will rattle on and not stop talking. People talk a lot when theyre nervous.Dahl quotes Green, the Ask a Manager columnist, in Cringeworthy, too. My advice is that you should embrace it, Green said of awkwardness at work, and find the humor in it.This article first appeared on Business Insider.